Durdenism level 0

im selfish i wish u're around but not like I'm beller company I'm just selfish n want u to myself around a round feideli u're not back u're not bothered by my fib cos u're rational n  sane which is good but sad, i can't affect lu unimporlant everything can kp us apart i dont have u tru tt I'm noling at all lets not talk till u're backeds. I keep gelling jealous when ure out n I feel stupideds cos ur goosmeow n u just talk n drink w friends. but im just jealous n selfish n I have to keep punchin n beatin myself to remind myself to not be stupid I will cry every night if i keep this up let's not talk till u're back. im miserable punching myself n crying cos i feel so lousy over nothing  we should breakeds till u're back. so I'll stop literally beating myself up n crying over nothing  we really should take 5 at least till lu back or even longer. im ouuta control doing the tyler durden unconvincingly without blood we should take a break then lu can hang outteds n I will try to keep out n not care n stop punching myself we should take 5 for 3 weeks so lu can be a friend n dun care abt me n I'll be made to keep off n stop being rubbish  let's not talk till ur back then I won't bother ur out w ur friends n I try to make myself bugger off n stop doing the tyler durden punching myself to stop my crapped up mind. at least he had better purpose and outcomes I'm just scary n mad. we should break up really. we really should break or take 5 so u can just do whatever u want n anyth cos i cant controlleds myself n it's not good for us. cos im just being v useless when u're just living like a normal person. im sorry i dun think i can do it n times ahead seem worse after tonight. let's not talk.  we really should break or take 5 so u can just do whatever u want n anyth cos i cant controlleds myself n it's not good for us. cos im just being v useless when u're just living like a normal person. im sorry i dun think i can do it n times ahead seem worse after tonight. let's not talk. i feel terrible. not ur fault we really should break or take 5 so u can just do whatever u want n anyth cos i cant controlleds myself n it's not good for us. cos im just being v useless when u're just living like a normal person. im sorry i dun think i can do it n times ahead seem worse after tonight. let's not talk. i feel terrible. not ur fault doing a Tyler durden is my new escape. better than sex thank u for being the greater being n bigger soul n always making things better n setting things right U're so precious

oldfibbing old year wish

i dun wanna do this anymore. flying down sprawled across the roof of the veranda in a decent dress but takglam undies not the best day to fly not the best day to die. i hate love u that u don't care abt the useless things that bother me. hate. u're too strong u can't carry on with this crap of a being.  i am pushing u away Every single day by dying in my head n stepping to the edge i know it takes more than this i want to take the fall the plunge that brings me down a death wish i foretell so bring me to my grave misery is not enough push me give a hand cut me deep in friend inert not stoned enough find me hide me bluff fix up this mess and make a better life instead throw me shut me out so help me take the lights out please I beg pardon me free this woe of a soul desperate not enough drive me to the wall hit me from the core bullet through my head give no love instead creep up feelings of worth less this damned curse cry my lifeless eyes bearing the time of toil of nothingness my weary shell time will never tell push me off the edge bring me through instead lift me up inside bring me down tonight live I don't wanna be here or anywhere anymore hookah spirits what's really in it drying dizzin' fits for fibbing if death was easier than life resolve resolute resolution revolution