not high.

i read his blog. refreshed, with eyes open, i understand words that i didn't before.
he is really into her... frustrating about how a trip can make or break a couple*

the asterixtar and coloured words.. no longer meant for me. well since when were they not meant for me. i haven't a clue. but i'm rather sure the latest one isn't. *i'll be so lost without you

cos it doesn't apply to us/me.
i'm addicted to attachment. it made me give up previous addictions.
this isn't good.

it's a depressant i know i shouldn't take and yet i indulge in it due to mere habit. indulge really seems wrong. since there's no enjoyment now. so rather, i do it out of mere habit.

give me a constant high. *high, so high.. up in the sky*

been emo-ing karen mok songs. and it started with this one which floated into my mind.

他不愛我

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EKt6tOqzFdI&feature=related

莫文蔚 - 陰天
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nxm7i9jRw0Q&feature=related

盛夏的果实
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Blt3oLWsCV8&feature=related

北極光 (canto v of 盛夏的果实)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M3Rstn0Bkeg&feature=related

莫文蔚 寂寞的戀人啊

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JoMgIL6z2oQ&feature=related

忽然之間

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JB5HWzDnW4I&NR=1

most of the lyrics resonate.

i saw through to his heart, seeing the shadows of another lingering
i saw his heart, playing all the movie scenes involving him with her
albeit that he doesn't love me, he still won and took away my heart with him

is love an opium for the spirit or just a boring past-time we induldge in at the end of the century.
the silly us, smiling how sweetly.
at the beginning everything was great every minute every second, it just seems the passion would never decrease. other than the mild feeling of fatigue after every passionate moment.
anyhow these few years, the heart ruled the head
isn't love just about two parties willing, it's best that we level our love debt and not owe each other anything.
at the bottomline, when it comes to love, one breaks free and one picks up the pieces.
it's just that those few years, there wasn't affinity for the both of you.

at least all the memories belong to me

why is it that i miss you when i'm at my most vulnerable.
我明白 太放不开你的爱....
分不开，想你算是安慰还是悲哀？
is it a comfort to think of you or is it just a pathetic thing for me to do.
not being able to part (in the heart), we may actually start to believe more in love.

wreck of the day *anna nalick
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JzigDWOweVw